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While I was in the army in Germany ... woke up in a city 50 miles away from where I was stationed, in an alley, badly beaten and without my wallet and military id. I somehow bummed a ride to the nearest military base, convinced the gate guards to call my first sergeant to verify who I was, and got an advance from the finance officer to get a cab back. Good times.
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"don't worry about that," says the angel,
"soon she'll be stinking in bed with a brainless dick."
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