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Originally Posted by noisereductions
Often when my wife and I are out to dinner and the waitress comes over, I say "the lady will have the linguine with clam sauce and a coke -- no ice." It's a classy move.
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Often when I'm out with my wife, I'll order a vodka martini. The bartender will ask if I want that shaken or stirred, and I curtly reply, "Do I look like I give a damn." Classy move.