Sonic Youth Gossip - Halloween Horror Nights

Hell yeah. I used to work in something like that under my church called the Haunted Tunnels (which I always thought was really ironic and awesome considering it was pretty wicked in there) from the time I was in 2nd grade all the way up through my senior year in high school. We'd work it the 29th through the 31st and hundreds of people showed up every year. There would be a bunch of strobes going, fog machines, busted up/bloodied mannequins hanging all over the place, crazy/creepy music (a couple of years we used Ummagumma for the backround music), and we'd hide in the crevaces of these tunnels and jump out and scare the shit out of people.....it's pretty disorienting with a bunch of screaming and strobes going on. I've never seen so much fear on peoples faces in my life when they walked through them.....especially at the end when we'd start up the chainsaw and chase these fuckers right of the tunnels onto our church lawn. I've had some of the best times in my life doing that every Halloween with a buttload of my friends that I'd bring along to work with me.......especially when we were in high school and the drugs started to take hold. HA!!!

Tunnel leading out of the remnants of Fort Cumberland, under the church.

Fort Cumberland
In 1754, the young George Washington (who had surveyed the site as an employee of the Ohio Company) was a Colonel in the Virginia Militia. He came to this site with troops under orders to push the French from territories claimed by the British colonies. Washington’s military failure and surrender at Fort Necessity (about 50 miles west of Cumberland) led to what Americans refer to as the French and Indian War.
In 1755, the British Army occupied the hilltop where the Church now stands and erected Fort Cumberland (named for the British Minister of War). The fort was 400’ by 120’ and served as the logistical headquarters for the army under the command of Gen. Edward Braddock. As such, it was the largest military installation in North America (up to that time). 5000 men, women and children lived and worked at Fort Cumberland at the height of its power in June and July of that year.
Braddock’s expedition ended in complete disaster in the Battle of Monongahela, and the community at Cumberland was plunged into deepest mourning. Under the leadership of George Washington, the fort continued to be garrisoned throughout that war.
All this time, the settlers in the area regularly joined the soldiers and their families in worship that was led either by a military Chaplain or, when none was present, by the Commander of the troops: George Washington. When the army left, the people continued to meet at the fort for their Church services.
The Fort was last used as a military installation in October of 1794 when then President George Washington brought the Army of the United States here to suppress the Whiskey Rebellion.

The church was built in 1823 on top of these tunnels/trenches that were a part of Washington's Fort.

The Tunnels
One of the features of Fort Cumberland was the system of earth works which today are known as the Tunnels. They are all that visibly remains of the fort.
Originally, these served three purposes. Beneath the storehouses in the fort, underground chambers were dug for the purpose of keeping perishable food fresh for as long as possible. The 5000 people at the fort ate 15000 meals a day! As well, gunpowder had to be stored with great care, and some of the chambers were lined with stone to serve as powder magazines. One still exists beneath the Church. Finally, the fort was made of wood, and thus highly vulnerable to attack. So along the banks of the Potomac and Will’s Creek to the east and south, and surrounding the fort at a distance of ¼ mile to the north and west were out defense works. These were accessed from the fort by trenches that extended out from beneath the fort’s walls.
100 years later, the same trench that once gave British soldiers a way to reach their defenses along Will’s Creek in safety became the way escaping slaves got up under the Church to the safety of the Underground Railroad station.

The horror.......the horror.

Oh and I don't use salad dressing.......just salt and pepper.