someone kill me
 

please

any preferences?

hard fast soon whatever

most importantly, I don't want to be able to think about it. no bleeding to death, etc.

okay, so

i learned how to work one of these last saturday, and odds are you won't survive...but google says that this guy did:

but thats only cause he tried to do it himself... you are smart by asking for help

i need the help. i need help. but, sadly (i suppose), i really just want to be free of the responsibility to protect those around me from thinking they failed me somehow.

do you have enough money to fly me to cali? i'll take care of the gun and cartridges, and don't worry, i wont need hotel fare, as it shouldn't creep me out too much to stay in your room after i off you

I don't think I have any friends who would kill me if I sincerely asked them to. I don't know if that is good or bad

Become an hero

I thought I was having an existential crisis, but the computer told me I was nihilistic. so I can't be sure.

fuckkkksskdfas

this is what internet friends are for.

i have never physically touched you, so its like blowing the shit out of pixels. simple.

may I blow your pixels?

if it will make you happy, sure

so generous

somebody kill me please
im on my knees, pretty pretty please
kill me
i want to diie
put a bullet in my heead

what song is that

im still alive :[

Nihilism is an existential crisis. Or the result of. Or whatever.

I know, but I found it humorous. Particularly the part about not being able to be sure if I was nihilistic or existential because they are almost the same, and part of the former is that nothing can be known blah blah blah whats the point wakawakawaka

I'll take the bait...
What's wrong Alex? What did you do? Anything mama can do to help that doesnt involve murder?

Euthanasia?

I suppose I'm down in the dumps. I want out of this year of high school. The future scares me. I'm losing the ability to empathize with people because humanity is a joke. Nothing matters. Suffering doesn't matter. I'm struggling to find some kind of peace and I am failing. I can't forget about it anymore. It all just keeps coming up. I'm lonely. It's all too much. There are 400 billion stars in this galaxy and it feels as though I am being stretched out by all of their gravity. And there are far more galaxies than people.

Sounds like you are 17 going on 18, and dealing with feelings that everyone of us who has had to grow up has felt at some point.The future is scary! But it is all about what you make of it man! Take peace in knowing that you are not alone in feeling those depressing thoughts, the masses are asses. But, don't let negative thoughts consume you. A positive attitude emits positive energy in effect causing positive things to happen!

BTW- If I was going to kill you I'd have to have fun while doing it, thus torture and a slow painful death would ensue...

Collective suffering doesn't make it better.

You may slowly kill me if need be.

So what do you want (apart from dying)?

What would you like here?

man this is me in my very early twenties.....
I really focused on recording music at that time and tried as much as possible to turn this existential/nihilistic junk into creative art. At that time i would also do large collages, writing and so recording music on the four track. With hindsight this period of time must have been my most creative, albeit maybe not the "best".
try to express it all through whichever media suits you.
I also travelled a whole lot, on my own, meeting weird people on my way.
What you explain is not "abnormal" in any way, i believe it's part of your "Buildungs" process.
take care!

Alex, just get plastered, and then whoa! problem solved... until next morning.

sounds like you need to catch some spiritual fire brother

I know how you feel, in my own way.....totally stuck. No outlet for it. Feel like I shoulda known how by now.

Fuckit!

Go break guitars on amps...I mean....that always sounds like fun.