diatribe: what one says when one wishes that every member of a certain ethnic group would be killed, but is not partial as to which group.

yclept

a portable electronic device, made by apple computers, that allows the user to shoplift without being caught

umami

umami - Nigerian word meaning "yo mama"

penumbra

your "yclept" was incredible, !@#$%!.

penumbra -- a new product out on the market that both keeps you dry in the rain and helps you take notes.

stoichiometry

stoichiometry - The measure of a person's indifference

metacrostic

are these real words?

as far as i know they are. i've had to look up several of them though.

--edit-- "metacrostic" doesn't exist. but i'll do it anyway.

metacrostic -- the puzzle that comes after the crossword.

effulgent

Effulgent: the measure in which a type of food fills you. E.g. the effulgent of bread is bigger than lettuce's effulgent.

Equerry

Equerry: An 18th century system of procuring a loan whereby one would deposit one's servants at the bank as guarantee.

Ululation

Ululation: rubbing one's nose in one's loved one's armpit.

Marrowfat

Marrowfat: packets of fat that appear on the necks of incredibly lazy people.

turnstile

Turnstile: an Olympian event of bathroom renovation

Abulia

Abulia (pr. Abu-Liar): one who holds people in makeshift prisons without justification.

barometer

barometer: A mythical creature that descends upon taverns in the wee hours of the morning, feeding off the tarnished souls of its intoxicated patrons.

Don't ask where I got that one.

Rictus

Rictus: Traditional, simple musical instrument made from forest floor debris by the gypsy people of Khazakstan

Fresian

Fresian: denoting the nationality of the offspring of the scantily clad women that promote Fresca.

Nugatory

Oh shit, that's not Fresca, that's Fanta. Oh well.

Nugatory: reminiscent of nougat

blithering

Blithering: A fashionable new body piercing located on an unspeakable portion of the female anatomy.

Esculent

Esculent - A french pastry made from snails

dudgeon